ALIASES: Bri, Bri-Guy, Uncle B, just plain B

SEX: male

ETHNIC MAKE UP: Half Portuguese, Quarter Irish, Quarter Mish Mash of White Texan Ancestry

NATIONALITY: American- something I'm not ashamed of, despite my disagreements with the government

AGE: 28

PLACE OF RESIDENCE: Orange County, California (center of world culture)

OCCUPATIONS IN MY LIFE: sign holder, landscape gardener, security guard, video store clerk, caretaker of disabled kids, dandy, gentleman of leisure

BENEFACTORS: Me mum

MARITAL STATUS: Bachelor Extraordinaire

SEXUAL ORIENTATION: I have a certain kinship with Alexander the Great, Jonathan and David, Socrates, Plato, Sappho, Julius Caesar, St. Augustine, Richard the Lion Heart, St. Anselm, Michelangelo, King James I, Tchaikovsky, Cardinal Newman, Oscar Wilde, Jack Twist and Ennis Del Mar

POLITICAL ORIENTATION: Liberal by nature, but open to dialogue

POLITICAL PARTY: Democrat

PROPOSED NEW POLITICAL CATEGORY: Bleeding Heart Centrist (Listen, love, and learn, and maybe we'll be able to overcome the insidious "culture wars")

RELIGIOUS ORIENTATION: Roman Catholic Christian

SPIRITUAL STATUS: a dying believer in the Living God, a fallen believer in the Risen Christ, a sinful member of the Holy Church

MORAL STATUS: a (sometimes) penitent sinner and a (sometimes) recovering addict of mind altering drugs; pray for me, I'm quite often a mess

GREATEST LOVES: Beauty, Goodness, and Truth (especially Beauty)

GREATEST DREADS: Ennui, Death, Deep Loneliness, Religious Hatred

SOCIAL STATUS: Cool Nerd/ Spirited Loser/ Intelligent Fool

TALENTS: drawing, writing, thinking, talking, singing

SUCKS AT: most things practical and/or lucrative

PERSONAL TRAITS ON A GOOD DAY: smart, entertaining, compassionate

PERSONAL TRAITS ON A BAD DAY: narcissistic, desperate, withdrawn and hopeless

GENERAL INTERESTS: Music, joking around, adventure and exploration, philosophy, psychology, religion, the mystery of Reality

FAVORITE MUSIC: Doo Wop, Soul music, the Beatles, 80's bands, the Strokes, THE KILLERS!

FAVORITE COMEDY: Dave Chapelle, The Wild Boyz

FAVORITE PLACES: Los Angeles, Death Valley, Mexico, Rome, and Yosemite

FAVORITE ANIMAL: My cat

MOST ADMIRED STRAIGHT DUDE: Heath Ledger!

HEART THROBS: Blink-182 and Jake Gyllenhaal

FAVORITE SPORT: I HATE most sports, but I really love hiking; additonally, I will climb up just about anything to impress my friends- plus I'm good at using bamboo Japanese fencing swords to scare the hell out of people

SOURCE OF SUPPORT: Family

SOURCE OF CONSOLATION: Friends

SOURCE OF MERCY AND SALVATION: The One True God, having given himself to us in Jesus Christ; the prayerful intercession of friends on earth, purgatory, and in heaven

SOURCE OF ENLIGHTENED GUIDANCE: the Roman Catholic Church

SOURCE OF CONTINUAL DISMAY: Worldly Existence as we know it; the stubborn ways of my own heart

GOAL IN LIFE: To find joy, love, and beauty, to help others, and somehow (over the rainbow and just past Big Rock Candy Mountain) to find my vulnerable little self right in the middle of Paradise